Slow Down

In the southeast, fireworks light up the sky – and in the southwest, a lightning storm.  The past two days have been quite warm, upper 80s, low 90s, and I expect it will continue that way for at least another day.  My body is needing some time to get used to this … it was snowing just a few weeks ago!, but it doesn’t feel as oppressive as the heat back east with the humidity dragging every ounce of energy out of me.  I moved slowly today, but – still cleaned MoFAB, took my morning and evening walks … there just wasn’t alot of production otherwise.  Oh!  I had my drum group!  Michael is back from Virginia and it was so good to sit with the group and drum together – it re-energized me as I was about to become whine-y about the heat.

I’ve never lived in a place that had a ‘fireworks season’.  Hunting season … sure … but fireworks?  Yes.  There’s a 10 day season that will (I hope) end on July 5th.  Every night the neighborhoods all over Butte are lit up with fireworks and resonate with the little and big blasts.  Sleep isn’t always easy – but I can always take a short nap in the afternoon if its too bad!

The slower pace that I’m taking with heat is slowing down the pace of everything – I’ve been moving in a very internal, thoughtful atmosphere within myself – and many things feel like they’re falling into place for me in terms of understanding.  I’ve been drumming, and playing my guitar, and writing, and taking long, slow walks, and it all feels really good to me.

This evening as I walked, the sky was glowing with an amazing orange/yellow light – and the clouds were thick with fantasitical shapes – and I realized that there has not been one day where I walked out and said, ‘oh, this is just like yesterday.. or last week’.  Every single day is unique.  A few days ago I watched a hawk soar across my field of vision and as I looked down, a fox ran across the path not so far ahead of me, and as it made its way through the fields, it kept looking back to check on my progress.  Some days I see the same people who are out when I walk, other days, there isn’t a soul in sight for the entire hour that I’m out.

I’ve stopped (for the moment) volunteering my time for any and every possibility that comes up – I’ve been more clear about what I do and don’t want to do.  These next weeks before school begins feel precious to me
and I’m placing a high priority on freedom.  I don’t feel any strong urge to DO or to GO, but more of an urge to really immerse myself in this place and enjoy it.